So I missed a few days, but I’m back. Still struggling with my own image, my own perception of myself and how that conforms or disrupts the general perception others have of me. I really tend and have tended through my life to be a very private person. Only those who get to really know me have seen inside the fortress that I have erected around my inner self. And it been erected both emotionally and physically. That may be what my weight is all about. (Freudians, Jungians, anyone wanna jump in here? …? No one? Okay…) I think that there are a lot of aspects to my psyche that even I am not willing to admit to at this point. Maybe that’s why I started the blog. I mean it a little self serving to think that anyone would read the ramblings I spout, but maybe this was an attempt to force myself more into the open. I’ve tried to be fairly open and honest in what I’ve written. I also try for a more whimsical, less psychological approach.
Anyway (a favorite word of mine!), this week has gone well. I got to spend time with my wife for our anniversary. We went to dinner and to a show and had a very good time. I was able to also review the show we saw, and that, I think, was where some of my latest angst has sprung from. The last review I wrote got criticized by someone who apparently felt that they had something to prove to me. I knew that the review was not the greatest to begin with. (You know, you win some, you lose some.) But you feel pretty good about it when you post the review and then someone criticizes you and you start to doubt what you’re doing. But you bravely post a kind reply that you really didn’t spoil anyone’s time by your review (except, obviously, the person that criticized your review) and try to go on. Then you find out that your arch nemesis (as you now refer to him mentally) decides to expand on just how incompetent and truly damaging to the entire art of theater you have now become as a reviewer. You really get your dander up and write a truly scathing rebuttal about how small minded and petty this person has become (especially when you find out that he was one of the actors in the show and now comes off sounding like a bitter, small-membered weasel who just wants to prove how incredibly smart he thinks he is by tearing you down) and your finger hovers over the “send” button. Then at the last moment you decide that you will take the high road and rewrite your response to say, essentially, thanks and I’ll take your enlightened views to heart (when hell freezes over or I have my brain removed, whichever comes first). So the end of all that is that you then agonize over your next review because you loved the show, but there were just so many small areas that seemed to miss the mark by that much (I know you can’t see my fingers being held closely together, but it’s happening nonetheless). And it should be posted soon, so head over to Utah Theater Bloggers and look for the review of “Man of La Mancha.” I will be going to see two more shows this weekend, so we’ll have to see what happens there.
Still no exercise yet. No time lately, but then I have to make the time, don’t I? Well, It’s not for lack of wanting, it’s just that I know I have to do it in the morning if I’m going to get it done. But that also presupposes that I’m getting to bed early enough to get up early to exercise. And I just haven’t done that yet.
Two Quotes for today:
“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes. - Jack Handey”
“A critic is someone who never actually goes to the battle, yet who afterwards comes out shooting the wounded. – Tyne Daley”
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